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Lee’s Story This is a true story written by a survivor of domestic violence.
The police and Defence Force guys were in good attendance and astounded at the turnout from the residents of our suburb. For the first time in years the police felt a unity with community members, and it was all due to the hard work of Mary, Gloria and I. Instead of becoming Police Reservists, the girls and I decided that we would rather work with the Defence Force, and so became involved in the Defence Force Safety Plan. Meetings were then set up with the Top Brass whose jurisdiction we fell under. Afterwards, a process was set into action that moved at a faster pace than any of us ever expected. I still couldn’t quite get my head around the fact that I – yes, little Lee - was sitting at a table discussing serious crime issues with a Colonel from the Army and that my input was taken seriously. I had a new lease on life. Mike soon became an irritation. I was spending more and more time in the evenings over the road at Mary’s house, planning meetings and action, and typing out minutes and the like. Mike’s sarcastic comments about the community policing project became mere words; going in one ear, and straight out the other. Whenever he would try to intimidate me, I could suddenly see him for exactly what he was; a man trying desperately to hold onto the ‘controlling power’ he once had over me. But it was slipping through his fingers. I simply shrugged him off as if he was of no significance whatsoever. I knew that I no longer feared him, and he knew it too. You see, I had made ‘friends’ with the very people that were there to uphold the law, and that law included protecting women who were on the receiving end of domestic abuse. Back in 1993 I had taken out a Protection Order against Mike. Now when he tried to yield his abusive power over me, I was quick to point out that all it would take was one phone call, and I’d have him locked up! Knowing that I really could was very empowering. But these first few months of associating with the Police & Defence Force members offered me so much more:
Of course Mike hated it that the playing field was beginning to level. He became threatened. He was losing control over me yet he couldn’t do much about it. Predictably, in response, he drank more. One night Mike came home very drunk and after the verbal abuse kicked in, he made it clear that he was not afraid of the police and that he was going to kill me before I could get much more involved with my community project. I remember him lifting his hand to hit me, but this time, instead of instinctively throwing my arms up defensively, I grabbed a small screwdriver off the piano, and stabbed it into Mike’s chest. He was shocked. I was even more so that I’d had the courage to do it. Swearing at him, I told him I’d kill him first. Then I ran to the bedroom. I was left alone. Mike was not badly injured that night. Although his ego was ripped apart, and of course he now had a little hole in his chest to remind him that ‘Lee had taken all she was prepared to take’. The following day, my children and I moved into Mary’s house across the road. We spent three weeks there, while Mike called constantly, begging and pleading with me to return. He was pathetic. Promising to ‘change’ – and apologizing over and over. I had heard it all before. Yet instead of him succeeding with his sympathy-seeking efforts, as he had managed to do so many times before, I got incredibly annoyed by it all. I was no longer ‘vulnerable little Lee’, living in constant fear of the man I called ‘husband.’ I had become ‘Lee, fighter, survivor’. And now all I had to do was ‘get out’ - once and for all. To be continued. “If just one woman, trapped in an abusive relationship is able to find the emotional tools to leave and better her life through reading my story, then writing it will have been worth it.” – Lee |